Maybe it isn’t wise for me to pour my heart out on a blog.
I am 27 years old now, living and working in Singapore. Time flashes before my eyes, and while there are many things I am unsure of, one thing is clear, I miss the good old days. Yet, somehow, this time feels even worse. I wish I could go back in time and undo the moments where I hurt the people I loved the most.
For a long time, I was too focused on the things that were hurting me. In doing so, I neglected the people who loved me and took care of me the most. Today, I have lost someone dear to me, though, in truth, I think I lost him a long time ago. It wasn’t because of one single night or one defining moment. It happened slowly, quietly, day by day, until we finally separated amicably.
Let’s call him Bobbie.
I first met Bobbie in October 2023. The first time we met, I noticed something different about him, though at the time we were only friends through mutual friends and didn’t talk much. We met again in November, and this time we spoke more. We exchanged Instagram handles, and not long after, we met again, grabbing food at Nelayan and coffee at Ona Coffee in Brunswick. I was ecstatic.
Bobbie was bubbly, kind, and genuinely fun to be around. I still remember the day I met him, and the day after that, when we had HOMM dessert. I was so nervous. Those moments marked the first time I ever went on proper dates. I had never experienced anything like that before.
At the end of the year, I returned to Singapore for the holidays, but we continued talking. We texted and called often. At first, I was so shy that I only showed my forehead on video calls. But slowly, I became more comfortable, showing my face and opening up to him.
Toward the end of the year, he told me something that completely caught me off guard, he wanted to see me. When he said that, my heart soared. He came all the way to see me. I remember praying to God that I would one day be with someone willing to cross the ocean for me, and he did.
We spent beautiful days together. We drank coffee at Alchemist, ate at Taste Good (since Three Meals A Day had a long queue), wandered through Haji Lane, and took cute photo-booth pictures. On the way to the airport, sitting in a Grab ride, he asked me to be his girlfriend. It was simple, unexpected, and incredibly sweet. That moment left a permanent mark on my heart.
Not long after, we met again in Melbourne, where our story truly began to unfold.
